I did it! I met my goal. I did not excel, but I hit the minimum 75% success required. It was a very rough 10 days! (Really? It was only 10? Sheesh, it felt like forever!) I plan on the next 10 being much better.
Over these last few days I've started to find peace, again, in the idea of being alone. This is an undulating road, but whenever it finds me I experience indubitable hope for the future. Whatever happens... I know I'll be ok. Alone isn't so bad. I get to grow and progress in any way I'd like, without being held back by another. There are no limitations upon me and no scapegoat to be found. I get the opportunity to become closely acquainted with my authentic self - my loves, my passions, what drives me and what brings me joy. I'm given no excuse not to serve others or build my spiritual strength, and no excuse not to become my best self.
In being alone, I'm beginning to know, really know, who I am and what I have to offer. It's knowing this, that brings me to the realization that I'd rather be alone than settle. I only get to live life once, and if I'm gonna have a partner by my side... he'd better be just that. A partner. A man with whom I'm equally yoked, who has a desire to be his best self with me. I pray I may find this, but until then I'll spend my time with my greatest investment. Me.
TODAY'S FOCUS: Start living for you, and you alone - because you understand that there's no one more worth living for. As you take time to be content alone, you'll receive inner strength that enables you to be all you can be. You raise the bar because, though you might be able to fool your significant other, you will never be able to fool yourself. YOU know your potential. YOU know your expectations, and YOU know when you can do better. When the only person to answer to is yourself, integrity is conceived and inner validation birthed. You come to know who you are and, in turn, you discover what you deserve. Never settle for anything less.
QUOTE: "When you learn what you can live without you're able to ask life for the very best because you posses the gift of discernment. You develop patience that enables you to wait gracefully and gratefully, until the best arrives, because you know it will." -Sarah Ban Breathnach (Author of Simple Abundance)
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Wow, I wish I would have found your blog sooner. Quite accidentally, I stumbled across your post on the meetup page and landed here.
ReplyDeleteAlthough I'm not particularly fond of the divorce experience, feeling alone & empty at times and visiting my own personal hell, I find hope and comfort in your words. You're a talented writer, and I hope you'll continue writing...for my own selfish reasons, but also as a means of finding (and/or keeping) the inner peace and the overall confidence you're exuding.
Thank you for this post!